|
home > real world > entertainment > jokes >
Hundreds of brave characters lost their lives during thousands of role-playing sessions leaving us their last words. We'll never forget them. Rest In Peace.
-What happens if you touch these two wires tog...
-I'll cut the red wire.
-Let's go in.
-Let's not go in.
-Wonder what this button does?
-Well ...., I'll touch it again.
-Oops.
-Oh shit.
-So what?
-OK, O Mighty Odin, as long as you're not gonna answer
my prayers, I'm gonna tell ya what I REALLY think of ya!
-So you're Tiamat, huh? Are you evil? Yes? Would you
like to convert?
-Whistling sounds? Naw, they can't have a grenade
launcher!
-Me first Me first.
To powerful demon: -Try me, shit breath!
To sleeping dragon: -Oops, sorry... didn't mean to
disturb you.
-Yeah, I know it's dangerous, but think of the experience
points.
-My two mutations?... But I have only one!
-Just because you're a dragon doesn't mean you can
push ME around!
-What do you mean trolls regenerate!?!
-Here kitty, kitty, kitty...
-Money!
-You wouldn't dare!
-AGAIN!?!?!
-Isn't there anything exciting in this dungeon?
-Uh guys? Hello? Anyone?
-You mean there's more? (About undeads which entered
the room)
-Don't worry, I can hit him! I can hit him!
-Don't be silly. That kind of monster NEVER follows
you.
-You racist! They're elves... So what if they're black?
-Look, I don't care what you think of her, or her
"demonic smile". She's hot to trot. So, if you'll excuse us...
-For some reason I had always imagined that bugbears
were somewhat smaller.
-Wanna see my new spell?
-Well, at least I tried...?
-OK pal, take your best shot.
-Dragon? What dragon?
-A juggernaught? What the hell's a juggernaught?
-"Brak"? That's a stupid name for a barbarian!
-Call me Kregor the Undying!
-Feel like surrendering?
-Say, what's that red dot on your forehead? (laser
sight)
-Do something, SCHMUCK!
-One of these must be the right one... just start
pushing buttons at random, we'll hit it.
-You are on my side, aren't you?!
-Oh shit... I'll try to teleport again.
-Remember that demon that you had imprisoned down
in the cellar? Well...
-You wouldn't happen to have a banishment spell memorized...?
-Okay, I put the fire resistance potions in the red
bottles, and the cold resistance potions in the blue. Or was it the other
way around??
-It probably just wants to be friends.
-Who cares about fucking telepathics. Lets torch him.
-Bugger! Failed my Intelligence test.
-You must be kidding! No?
-Don't worry! I still have a dagger attack.
-Hey scumbag, we'll do it my way, or I'm gonna have
to kill you.
-Shit. Why did I slay the healer?
-Live and let live? Yeah, right!
-Don't worry, it's not loaded.
-Wanna have more?
PL: -Hi, my name is Hurga the Immortal.
DM: (smiling) -I hope you have an Hurga the Immortal II worked out...
-I can kill everything. What is it?
-This does have a safety catch, doesn't it? (Nope.)
Priest: -Okay, God, you wanted it this way.
-Don't shoot, it's me.
|
BluePink 
